More Crystal Gem Cartomancy

Final post this week (probably) about this thing I’ve been fiddling around with.

Not much to detail.

Dreamed about food. Maybe indoor meals, but I don’t remember specifics. Did a single-draw about it anyway, to keep in practice.

AMETHYST IS HUNGRY

AMETHYST IS HUNGRY

Then had a couple of dreams that left me feeling as though I’d gone through some epic adventure, but I couldn’t recall the specifics of those, either. Rose Quartz was gigantic in one, and she met her son-self the eponymous Steven Universe of the series, except he had turned into an adorable yellow-brown jackalope.

the Joker card

NO ANSWERS HERE

And then I did my first reading for somebody else with playing cards, modified from a spread in the Little White Book accompanying my usual deck, the Shadowscapes tarot:

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Columns left to right: Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl, Rose Quartz.

Rows, bottom to top: body, heart, mind, spirit.

I couldn’t interpret the Jack of Spades in the column of Pearl, row of spirit. I thought the court cards would be people if not personalities, and when they don’t give off that vibe to me with tarot cards, I think of pages as messages, knights as journeys, and the monarchs as underlying circumstances or movements (I swap the ranks of the Queens of Cups and Pentacles from standard, so the supporting monarchs describe circumstances whereas the highest-ranking monarchs describe movements.)

Crystal Gem Cartomancy and Dream Interpretation

The following entry may contain triggering material.

The dream: My deceased, abusive mother and estranged, abusive sibling sat at an antiseptically clean-white kitchen table together. I mentioned that their lousy attitudes towards relationships and sexuality left me vulnerable to sexually abusive dynamics. They disagreed without substance to their counterargument.

Deck: playing cards (read here for system)
Spread: Red King’s Crown

1. (Center) Signifies the Querent. Five of Spades.
2. (Crossing) The crux of the issue. Four of Hearts.
3. (Top) Themes to consider. Seven of Spades.
4. (Upper left) Symbols from the dream. Three of Diamonds.
5. (Upper right) Symbols from reality. Two of Hearts.
6. (Lower left) Why the dream doesn’t wake up. Seven of Hearts.
7. (Lower right) Why reality doesn’t sleep and dream. Ten of Spades.
8. (Bottom) Future, culmination. Eight of Diamonds.

Pain that comes from really nowhere, crossed by the signifiers of love without the essence or substance of it. In our waking life history, I wasn’t a troubled adolescent or young adult to them so much as I was malfunctioning: I wasn’t supposed to have a perspective of my own, or feelings, and family wasn’t supposed to recognize or respond to those as though they mattered (unless they can pull a double standard: hours of complaining about one time I left my keys inside before going out, to the point of rallying resistant roommates and making calls to mutual friends, was “just venting”; if I pointed out that continual advice and scolding about what I should do about my cough was beginning to come off as aggressive, I should loosen up and not expect everybody to be perfect, and why do I have to be insulting and hurtful, why she’ll show me aggressive.)

I’ll get back to the Seven of Spades.

Symbols from reality, (Two of Hearts) current infatuation, contrasted with having learned from past infatuations that I absolutely cannot trust my feelings or instincts about anybody. I don’t love what’s good for me, and…frankly, I’m not eligible for someone to share their life with that way, anyhow, I’ve got too many practical issues right now to be good company for anyone.

Symbols from the dream (Three of Diamonds) suggest that my solo-parent, two-child family fit together very, very, very well…perfectly, actually…and that wasn’t a good thing.

Seven of Spades suggests that these are growing pains: learning to fight for love, and, because Spades are Amethyst’s suit, learning to love to fight.

The dream won’t wake up (Seven of Hearts) because…I carry over issues from people I’ve avoided and apply them to dynamics/relationships where those people are gone. That doesn’t mean that I’ve won against some echoing violation of some principle, it means I’ve introduced conflict where there previously was none.

Reality won’t sleep. Because reality, like evil, never sleeps. Conclusively, reality is eeevil…

From the Eight of Diamonds, I get the sense of calcification. Everything will become clear and make perfect sense…which is always the moment I should know I’ve missed something…but, narrative is power, and power is amoral and orthogonal to truth. There’s a sort of power that makes something true, and I’ve never witnessed the beneficial effects of that.

Dream and Tarot Interpretation

The following entry may contain triggering material.

The dream, logged the morning of 19 September 2016.

I was trapped in a hotel with what looked like young Winston Churchill. He had Kilgrave’s mind-control powers. Officer Daisy from “Anansi Boys” (in my dream played by Naomie Harris) led me stealthily to the basement and out some secret stairs to safety. The next scene felt more like news footage I was watching: Daisy led riot police against not-Kilgrave’s mind-controlled minions. Some overcast morning after Daisy won, and everyone stayed indoors as though embarrassed that civil unrest had temporarily happened, I wandered around the empty city streets. Then I realized that I was feeling lighthearted enough to fly, which was a superpower I thought I’d lost after getting Kilgraved. Then I woke up.

My therapist mentioned that dreams which fall into three acts can be interpreted thusly: Act I symbolically describes the issue. Act II, the environment that exacerbates the issue. Act III, a suggestion from the wise subconscious.

This is why I get so annoyed by symbolism: the issue presented in the dream could be intimate violence, or how I hold onto my middle class privilege like a hot potato, or my fear and loathing at having reasoning so manipulated. That last one goes back to grade school shunning because I was born out of wedlock, which I can’t exactly make amends for or stop doing because I was literally actually born that way—but it was so, so easy for everyone to get herded about by the word of one person who just decided I was Satan. And I have not noticed this tendency disappearing in older people. I’d linked a conspiracy theorist to a CIA officer’s lecture about the unsustainable nature of the world order, appreciating the paraphrasing of Heinlein’s razor: (“Faced with a choice between conspiracy and incompetence, I’d go with incompetence.”) Whether this theorist would consider the points of that lecture apparently hinged on one question: This is one of the good guys, right? I’d wanted to reach through both our computer screens, grab their collar and scream, “I am not the one to sort out for you who is good and who is bad in this world!” They had their own damn mind, they used it to study the conspiracy of a flat earth, but! They had their own moral compass, at least! Didn’t they? Didn’t they?? I have to believe in that. But I also wanted to tell them that I was a shapeshifting reptile alien conspirator, or possibly that I was Satan, if that lie would get across for even a moment that they mustn’t invite me to do their thinking for them just because I learned the jargon.

…Considering what a nerve that struck, it’s probably that third one.

Act II, the news reports, suggests a detachment to this. I can witness heroic victories as Daisy’s, and maybe a fluffy fantasy of the Right And Good Thing for once, just once, also being the Smart Thing That Wins. I can’t lead or embody this, because that’s just not a combination that happens. Gaiman’s Daisy is a digital law enforcer, rather than a more classic action heroine.

Act III suggests some alone time outside of my comfort zone? I don’t know. What do the cards say?

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Deck: Shadowscapes
Spread: Red King’s Crown

1. (Center) Signifies the Querent. The Chariot.
2. (Crossing) The crux of the issue. Eight of Cups.
3. (Top) Themes to consider. Seven of Pentacles.
4. (Upper left) Symbols from the dream. Four of Wands.
5. (Upper right) Symbols from reality. Ten of Pentacles.
6. (Lower left) Why the dream doesn’t wake up. Ace of Pentacles.
7. (Lower right) Why reality doesn’t sleep and dream. Judgment.
8. (Bottom) Future, culmination. Knight of Pentacles.

These feel like random cards. The prominence of pentacles and the absence of swords would suggest the exact opposite of my original interpretation: this dream is not about something as abstract as ideology, but more grounded in maybe sexuality or finances. (But that’s never any fun.)

I’d take the first two to mean that I’m on some sort of war path (Chariot) but I keep it all inside (Eight of Cups.) I do not! I take action, I-I…blog… Anyway, the Seven of Pentacles suggest a shared theme of delay or frustration. That doesn’t connect to the dream, though, because there was always something happening, then resolved, then setting in motion the next thing happening.

Daisy is one major symbol in the dream that fits the Four of Wands. Yes, the card shows a herd, and I’ve ranted about herd mentality, and in the dream I followed along. Because I was in a bad place with somebody bad, and she cared, and she knew better than I did about what to do. Sometimes that’s just what happens.

Symbols of reality…We don’t question everything, even though we should according to those inclined to complain about sheeple (which I thought was a portmanteau of “sheep” and “temple”) (in this case should it be guyselle? i think the animals in the wands card are gazelle.) Some adages pass as fact because they’ve become popular, or they’ve been popular far too long for anyone to notice that “popular” is a better descriptor than “true”. That doesn’t mean that whatever force sustains its presence or value is going to change. In a way, it becomes its own baseline of reality, its own inevitability.

The dream won’t wake up precisely because it’s seeded by waking life; waking life won’t fall asleep because I keep trying to look beyond or deep within or otherwise transcend it—not a causal because, more like a reminder that reasoning/hope isn’t impact.

The knight of pentacles represents some more purpose-driven and concrete journey already. That’s good.

Crystal Gem Cartomancy

The following entry may contain triggering material, spoilers for Steven Universe and Soylent Green.

I appreciate how commonplace playing cards are, and I admire fellow whatever-you-call-us’s tips to turn commonplace objects wishcraftsy. Too bad the images are too abstract for me in this case. I’d have the same reader’s block with a lot of tarot “pip decks”. I like them fully-illustrated with some sort of story to make of those images. At the same time, structure mattered a bit, not enough that I’d ever master the Opening of the Key spread. I’d trimmed the Dream Cards (sliced off the borders, had a corner-rounder for them and everything, though I don’t recommend pen cutters—broad bladed box cutters made for cleaner slices) but kept trying to think them into a tarot system anyway, which was awfully limited of me to think. If I hadn’t lost them when I ran away from home, I’d finish the trimming and try to appreciate that deck as a structureless, intuitive oracle. My first reading with the elected major arcana and court cards of that deck was eerily accurate.

When I wondered about Steven Universe as a pop culture pagan thing, my next thought was that there was enough story to fit with something as abstract and structured as a card deck.

Thought Process

I. Each of the suits would be ruled by one of the four survivors of the Gem Wars: Garnet as the balanced heavy-hitter, clubs; Amethyst as the challenger from Earth, spades; Pearl with the structures and lucidity, diamonds; and Rose Quartz as ruling the suit of hearts.

II. What the ones to tens of each suit would mean then got me thinking about numbers as a pure notion. The tarot aces, I would interpret as a pure, nascent form of the suit. The Ace of Cups would be a flash of intuition or interpersonal understanding, the Ace of Swords would be an irritation or epiphany…Maybe tens would symbolize overall excessiveness, but in between I didn’t think to interpret by pip number. I’d learned keywords, and putting a number to the suit would be more a way to organize those keyword concepts, than significant in and of itself.

III. I drew up a spreadsheet to write keywords in as they occurred to me. Ace of Garnet would be stardust, two would be fission, three would be fusion, four would be home because the fandom name for her is Square Mom…Ace of Amethyst would be seed, two would be rejection, three would be curiosity, four would be self…Ace of Pearl would be order, two would be fealty, three would be balance…

IV. What does suit plus number mean to each of them? Once I filled out the table, I thought, I could consider the whole and find general patterns (what’s the three-ness between fusion, curiosity, and balance?)—and then make adjustments to better fit that general pattern.

Except that the suit of Rose Quartz came to mind like: Ace of Rose is love, two is love (healing?), three is love, four is love, five is love (protection?), six is love (honesty? c’mon R.Q. gimme something more specific), seven is love, eight is love, nine is so much love (cosmic?), ten is so much love…

So I got to actually shuffling an actual deck of cards, to find out what meanings I could intuit based on what I knew of the story. The above spread just occurred to me and felt right to do. The question was: What should I know, about all of you and this method?

1.) Garnet, top, the multiple possibilities of a foreseeable future. Six of Diamonds.
2.) Amethyst, mid-right, how to attack…erm, approach this issue. Three of Spades.
3.) Pearl, mid-left, what to worry about (plan for or resolve). Two of Clubs.
4.) Rose Quartz, bottom, foundations for healing/growth and protection. Five of Diamonds.

Six from the suit of Pearl in the position of Garnet generate a Sardonyx with a quality of six-ness. This conveyed to me a moderate number of equally likely futures, perfectly calculable but not worthy of the effort. The stakes of choosing one over another path are average.

Three from the suit of Amethyst in the position of Amethyst, with a quality of three-ness. Just do a thing to make a thing happen.

Two from the suit of Garnet in the position of Pearl didn’t come off as a fusion this time, but an irreconcilable distance between reasoning and passion.

Five from the suit of Pearl in the position of Rose Quartz came off more like a suggestion to being humble and charitable…so, I admit this is a slapdash mess and I post it here for anybody who can make something of it to make something of it.

~

I think what I liked most about this reading was that this deck is made of flippy, slippy, plastic card. As I understand to make it called for dredging up fossilized ancestors to fuel some pollution of the air, and it takes so long to break down and become part of the ecosystem again, and even when it does a bit, the tiny plastic bits displace the nutrients in baby seagulls’ digestive systems and whatever other animals accidentally eat it, so they starve without feeling hungry, so the diligent seagull parents never get to see their baby seagulls grow because they die and the seagulls never know what they did wrong by their babies—I don’t like this part. It’s a horrible part.

But when I wondered if plastic cards would be less conducive to cartomancy for not having some distant relation to some earthly autotroph who was wise in the ways of life before getting bleached and dyed with chemicals we make for a shortsighted purpose and then just throw somewhere else, but it’s tree pulp so it’s natural and more magical…and I admit, I usually am more comfortable working with natural materials. It’s the texture, or the smell. It’s usually comfy. I liked shuffling these cards, though…

…I thought I could hear Garnet reminding me that these cards are made of stardust, just like everything else in the corporeal world—and besides, Gems are all about technological innovation. Waterproof playing cards are fine representations of that.

(…but we citizens of the developed and developing worlds accidentally created an artificial island out of garbage…This deck will outlive me and end up there, and our descendants would be crying over soap bars and tomatoes, visiting tree museums, referring to women as “furniture”, and eating Soylent Green. Soylent Green looks like plastic chips.)

…Hrmm…maybe I should have thought up a Steven Universe based divination system using dice in shapes other than cubes. Those can look like gems.

Waking Nightmares and Tarot

The cards shown above come from the Shadowscapes deck, and the spread is one I like to call the Möbius.

1. (Center) Signifies the Querent. The Hanged Man.
2. (Upper-Right) Illusion of the situation. The Moon.
3. (Rightmost) Reality of the situation. Eight of Pentacles.
4. (Lower-Right) Weaknesses, obstacles, hindrances. Death.
5. (Upper-Left) Strengths, opportunities, helpers. Five of Swords.
6. (Leftmost) Querent’s influence on the situation. Nine of Wands.
7. (Lower-Left) Future, outcome. Knight of Pentacles.

I was browsing for groceries earlier this Tuesday, and was generally feeling pretty good. I’d taken on a part-time job here, some freelance side-jobs there, got my laundry done, and my roommate Cecilia didn’t cover for my rent for the last couple of months because I did.

Somewhere between the aisle of sandwich spreads and the checkout counter, it occurred to me that everything I do and say is absolutely wrong because I’m the one who did or said it. And it’s not even going to matter because beyond the expectations of civilized life, beyond even the mirages of material reality, awakes a massive gray blob that hungers…to sift us through its misty teeth and devour our souls.

So. Uh. That was new. I’d been depressed before, but not quite so…suddenly? And the scope of it, well.

When I got back home to the haunted house, I dealt the cards for that one.

Hanged Man, representing some sort of static transition and the suffering that comes from that, in the position of the Querent’s Signifier means, “You Are Here.” Which was accurate. The Moon in the position of the perceived reality indicates that I expect something mysterious and magical to be associated with this experience.

The Eight of Pentacles in the position of what the reality of the situation actually is, indicates that this was likely to be a more physiological brain thing.

Death in the position of “things to be cautious about” reads to me sort of like this deck is saying, ‘You know what your problem is? I’ll tell you what your problem is. You give attention and consideration to everything, even the worst random ideas. And you try to adjust to everything! This was not worth a tarot reading about.’

Ironically, I probably wouldn’t have blogged about this specific reading if the Death card hadn’t come off as so sassy about how what happened wasn’t even worth a reading. But also worth examining, I think, is the Five of Swords in the position of strengths, opportunities, and helpers. By itself, the card indicates abandonment. In this position, I could have interpreted it to mean ‘All possible advantages you could have had, are now lost to you.’ Instead, it came off to me more like, leaving something alone would be the recommended course of action.

The Nine of Wands usually means that the odds are stacked overwhelmingly against the Querent. In the position of the Querent’s influence on events, that suggests the same increased identification with the most prominent figure in the card as the Five of Swords. Instead of being abandoned by, or driving away those show in the Five of Swords, the Querent becomes the deserter. Instead of being threatened by those shown in the Nine of Wands (outgunned, outmanned, outnumbered, and outplanned), the card denotes the means and ways to rise far above whatever contender to this position that the world—or perception of the world, with which there would occasionally be some overlap—has conjured up.

And the Knight of Pentacles encourages a shift in focus to more practical concerns, than some otherworldly blob that nobody can really do anything about.

The balance of tarot trumps (the Hanged Man, Moon, and Death cards) against the minor arcana in the spread indicate the querent being enamored with trumped-up mysteries and disadvantages.

Some wishcraft to reverse the Hanged Man could be recommended.

Dreaming and Tarot

The cards shown above come from the Shadowscapes deck, and the spread is a favorite of mine for dream interpretations. Here’s a link to the original spread from Aeclectic, although I modified it a bit and call it “the Red King’s Crown”.

1. (Center) Signifies the Querent. Eight of Cups.
2. (Crossing) The crux of the issue. Seven of Pentacles.
3. (Top) Themes to consider. Eight of Pentacles.
4. (Upper left) Symbols from the dream. Four of Pentacles.
5. (Upper right) Symbols from reality. Four of Cups.
6. (Lower left) Why the dream doesn’t wake up. The Hermit.
7. (Lower right) Why reality doesn’t sleep and dream. The Wheel of Fortune.
8. (Bottom) Future, culmination. Ace of Wands.

09 April 2016. I dreamed of being in a computer laboratory where all the work stations had boxy beige monitors from the mid-1990s. It felt like a grimy, cluttered place and someone out the corner of my eye kept muttering out loud to no one in particular how everything I was doing was going exactly according to their plan. This creeped me out, so I went back to this apartment I don’t live in in waking life, and Miasma was there in a black trenchcoat and lying facedown on a giant mattress. We kept giving each other the silent treatment.

I like that this reading feels like it actually says something meaningful. For a long while recently, any spread I laid out would feel like a number of random cards had been randomized in a shuffle and then randomly drawn.

One of my beliefs in how the tarot works does go that way: The trouble with personal reasoning is that it develops trends and regularities. When one gets stuck in a thought pattern or a life pattern, then something random can get someone unstuck. Specifically, the ideas introduced by some system of divination, which itself can rely on external patterns that don’t reasonably apply. Reasoning can form a trap.

How regularly I read, and the associations that I’ve developed by reading each card, might have made a regularity of a random thing like a deck of cards. Still, I conjecture that the shuffle keeps things fresh.

Another one of my beliefs in how the tarot works developed after a Quest to some vague idea of a tarot or oracular intelligence. She was one of the first guisers I’d met, before I’d even taken to calling these people ‘guisers’. I named her Lavender. After about two years of sharing and working within that liminal space, Lavender vanished with Eddy and all the furniture in my astral home. I can guess at, but can’t be entirely sure of, what happened there. And I have no clue at all about Lavender’s history or nature, apart from that we could interact in the otherreal and surreal, and that Lavender had some association with this tarot deck.

I still read this same deck after Lavender left. It still operated the way a tarot deck would, but without Lavender, it would kind of bother me that I didn’t know how. I could default to thematic apperception, subconscious knowledge coming to the consciousness as intuition, or the Weirdly ordered universe doing that weird thing where everything is perfectly ordered and therefore meaningful. That third option which I outright reject because it doesn’t validate my pessimistic and cynical worldview.

Onwards, regardless, to the reading pictured above. The querent’s significator denotes an inner emotional questing, which matches up with a spread for dream interpretation. The crux of the issue appears to be a frustrated fruition of something. Themes I should consider would be the ordinariness, or stability, of daily corporeal life, represented by the Eight of Pentacles.

Symbols from the dream represented by the Four of Pentacles could indicate the sort of expeditious retreat from whoever was in the dream computer lab and verbally holding me to my own nature, just because it would affect the speaker positively (and I neither intended nor consented to that.) It could also indicate the “silent treatment” that Dream Miasma and I were giving each other, when Miasma was literally not doing anything in the dream, and I had felt that same sort of contemptuous repression.

This becomes a symbol of reality, the Four of Cups, in how the tendency to compress ends up draining more stamina than it should (by all reason) save.

The “dream won’t wake up” (whatever that means) because, well, the way the Hermit mirrors the dragon hoarding the coins, it’s a dream that’s already going to be as awake as it’s going to get. And, “reality won’t fall asleep” (whatever that means) because it isn’t the, umm, metaphysical season for the waking and dreaming worlds to cross over each other?

In a spread so locked into ordinariness, regularity, and inwardly-bound movements, the card that represents the outcome is a welcome one. The Ace of Wands represents to me some burst of inspiration, some way out of the rut.

Belated Reunion Post

I had a blog post in the works before the end of last year that continued the exploration of modern forms of invidia-apotropaic, and meant to post the form of the thing as unique to the Otherfaith on the occasion that celebrates the defeat of Jealousy* for all time.

Whenever I hear somebody accusing anybody else of being “just jealous” I flinch away and shake my head. Doesn’t the speaker know how immature that accusation comes off as? It broadcasts an insecurity so personal that even the accuser can’t know that they’re voicing it, and wraps it up in a humblebrag that makes sympathy impossible. So, I’ve got to make clear that invidia-apotropaics are an intellectual interest. I personally have nothing to envy.

But it’s a lie, that nobody needs an envy-apotropaic except to disguise self-aggrandization with fear. While my unenviability might be true now, I look back on my life and find all these damaging ways to cope with the company of people who I didn’t want to believe were vindictive or jealous. I really wanted to believe they were just unpleasant because they were hurt, and that they were honest about what I could do (was supposed to do) about that. The temptation to dismiss bad behavior as jealousy would never overpower the sheer embarrassment of how immature that accusation would sound. But what became a commitment to self-sabotage didn’t always stop me from blurting out pretentious and even hurtful words, it wasn’t a path to awareness of my privileges and intuiting what would be the best and right thing to do with them, and it still didn’t transform mean people into nicer people. It cost my family far more than what I tried to rescue them from. I’d say it was all based on a dynamic of unhealthy boundaries (not jealousy itself so much as how expressions of hrmmgrumblemumblejealousy reacted with my own lack of fortitude,) not that I’ve entirely figured out by now what a dynamic of healthy boundaries would even be like.

But a message that I think would have really helped back then, shines pretty demonstrably in Otherfaith mythology: You’re not supposed to pretend that you’re less awesome than you are. Nobody is supposed to aspire to dim or snuff out the joy in someone else’s heart, take them down a peg or several, decide what their place is and put them there.

Sometimes I consider the myth of the Sundering in terms of what fanfiction writers call “Fix-It Fic”: If only Pallis had found it in her to tell Mircea, “I’m sorry that I knocked you off your path, but I don’t owe you this because of it, this is me and mine,” and meant it. If only Arabella could have caught Mircea mid-tantrum and woken up to the fact that he should be happy that she has a chance at not dying, if he really loved her, but he didn’t. If only the Clarene could have gotten through that the only cause for someone like Mircea to compare himself to anybody else is when he’s making sure that someone else has enough of what they need. (I can’t think of what the Ophelia could have done or said.)

But that all makes it out like the real problem was something or somebody other than Mircea himself. The Sundering displayed the worst consequences of keeping that sort of thing around, and resolved by Mircea ceasing to exist. That was for the best, in my opinion.

(Two dissenting seeds of an opinion at the back of my mind: First, that perhaps the feeling of jealousy calls attention to some imbalance and therefore some injustice, perhaps the feeling is misdirected admiration, aspiration, and ambition…but at the moment it’s considered as such, jealousy held inside transforms into something else, something that could be constructively communicated or could even be a creative force. Perhaps to receive jealousy means to draw attention to the privileges of the target that are not being traded on as allies to the underprivileged. At some point, though, this reframes active harm as justified or even complimentary. This might be a bad seed or it depends on how I water it. Second, a distinctive shift from understanding these gods and spirits as incorporeal people, through how I’ve been told…repeatedly, by various different corporeal people in my offline life…that it’s wrong to blame as in identify a person as the problem instead of envisioning solutions to a systemic/dynamic impersonal problem. Well, fine then, Mircea alone remains figurative, even if I encounter or get possessed by him or encounter someone somehow possessed by him—gods forbid it all! By complete coincidence, I can’t exactly regret the unpersoning I’ve done, even as it’s caused almost as many problems as it threatened to cause and evident repercussions can always worsen. Getting a lot more breathing room right away could remain an option if the real trouble with blame is really the noisy confrontation, rather than the act of identifying the problem as a person.)

Above pictured is a simple tarot spread based on the Reunion of the Laetha and the Dierne. This spread’s position follows:

1. Lefthand side (Laetha’s message)
2. Low point (Mircea’s mess…erm, more like what’s meant to be left behind)
3. Righthand side (Dierne’s message)
4. High point (what to look forward to in the coming year)

What signifies the Laetha and the Dierne here, respectively the Hierophant and the Chariot cards, comes off to me as somewhat in opposition to the nature of who these signify. The Hierophant gives me the sense of the Luddite, whereas the Laetha is a god of technology; and even this Chariot with the wonderfully flowy art suggests a stagnancy (as a lot of Chariot tarot cards give off to me) that I find ill-suited to the Dierne as the dancer.

I usually associate the Dierne herself with the Star card, but it’s also appropriate to Mircea.

I swear, I shuffled all 78 cards together. I even have more difficulty interpreting major-only tarot card draws, because the suits and pips are the ones with applicable specifics.

The interpretations I speak, the interactions I seek, with the stories and gods and spirits and people of the Otherfaith, I’ve hoped to have kept personal. I wouldn’t want to speak for (or over) anyone else, which has happened when I’ve been as excited. Despite that, or a point entirely apart from that, all these majors come off to me as a reminder that the Otherfaith is bigger than myself, and the High Priestess (in the position of what to look forward to in the next year) an invitation to contemplate that.